Feets don't fail me now

Bob -

There are many things that are important to me about running.   So many that I can't list them.  Mainly it is just  great to see your body respond to something you work hard at.  I have been running on a fairly regular basis now for about 4 years.  I've had some ups and downs, but overall I have seen decent progress.  Other than some aches and pains, I have come out of the running experience pretty well unscathed.  Lost weight, got faster, increased my distance and developed some awesome calves.  Yeah, I said it.  They are awesome.  Maybe not to you or anyone else, but when I look at them, I get all giddy.  But who care about that?  We are here to talk about my running toes.  They are hideous.  Ugly.  I have had so many blisters and lost so many toenails, that I can't even count them.  I've changed shoes, changed my stride.  I even changed my compression shorts every so often and I still get blisters.  They usually are on the tips of my toes.  They grow under my toenails and push the nails outward and upward.  The nails are reaching for the sky, trying to stretch their boundaries.  I'm all for reaching for goals, but what happens is they pry away from my toe skin and that hurts.  So, I perform surgery on myself.  Get out the needle and push it it in there.    Pop go the weasel cause the weasel go pop!  Sppplurt goes the blister juice and instant relief.  Thar she blows!  The problem is that the nails have come loose from their moorings.  The ship has sailed.  It is only a matter of time before the nail is completely lost.  What happens in the interim is very interesting.  Sometimes a new one grows in while the old one is still there.  A few times I believe I had three nails on one toe.  My most horrific experience was when I think three or four fused together on one toe and then grew into my skin.  Big, thick and trying to burrow into the toe.  I could not cut it or do anything about it.  Painful yet ugly.  So, I soaked my foot for about an hour, got out the needle and clippers and started poking and digging.  This dislodged the perpetrator and I was able to clip it down.  What was left was a hole.  A hole that disgusted my entire family, but I was pretty proud of it.  I earned that hole.  Hundreds of miles, three Tough Mudders, and countless work hours went into the making of that hole.  A nail has finally started to sprout.  I have most of my nails again.  Last weekend I did a pretty tough trail half marathon.  There was lots of stress on my running toes.  I am going to enjoy my new nails for the short time they are here.


Addendum to aforementioned toe situation.  I do not endorse self surgery (actually I do, because I think doctors are a waste of time for stuff like this), self surgery can lead to further trauma(like a doctor telling you shouldn't run), use of a sewing needle can lead to infection(which is why you hold it under a match for a couple seconds) and if blisters occur, rest is recommended(stop being a big freaking baby, it is just a blister)